A dental student's worst nightmare. That's what you can expect come August in Glendale as a snaggle-toothed horde of trailer park refugees descends on the Jobing.com Arena for Freedom Concert '09, a benefit show sponsored by Fox News wing-nut poster boy Sean Hannity and Phoenix's official Republiloon radio station KFYI 550 AM.

Think of it as cross between the Grand Ole Opry and the Taliban wing of the GOP, with bearded anti-immigrant yahoo Charlie Daniels, Lee "Proud to be an Amer-i-cun" Greenwood, Billy Ray Cyrus -- father of jailbait poptart Miley Cyrus, Jesus freak pretty-boy Michael W. Smith, and document-shredding Iran-Contra scandalista Oliver North. Just how the disgraced former Marine'll be contributing to this musical smorgasbord is a mystery. Will he sing backup when the band strikes up Dixie? Play the medals on his shirt like a glockenspiel? Or both?