• Tech Support: "Well, just go to [URL]."
• Customer: "How do I do that?"
• Tech Support: "Type it in in your web browser."
• Customer: "Huh?"
• Tech Support: "Ok...sir...do you have Internet access?"
• Customer: "Huh? No. No Internet. I don't even have a computer."
• Tech Support: "Ok, sir, you need a computer and an Internet account to access web sites."
• Customer: "Oh. Well, it didn't say that when I mailed in the membership card. I want my money back."

• Student: "I'm not on a web site. I'm on www.ask.com."

Emailed to the owner of a web page:

I got here by some nefarious route. I was trying to get to [an email address] or other similar sites. I distinctly dislike being hijacked in cyberspace to see something I did not ask to see. If this happens again I will make a formal complaint to my local federal district attorney. Thank you. Do not do this again.

A customer emailed the following to his ISP:

hello, I have just published my first web page. What is my address? Never mind, found it, thank you."