Gentlemen, welcome to your first training session for Operation Charm and Awe.
Gentlemen, allow me to introduce you to the MM-350.
This represents the cutting edge in combat-ready dialogue-facilitation technology.
Correction, soldier. Per President Obama’s new orders you’ll now refer to me as “Emmy.”
Yes, Emmy. It’s short for Emissary of Understanding. Do you have a problem with that?
No, I’m serious, soldier. If you do have a problem with it, now would be a terrific time for us to try out President Obama’s new “Hug It Out” Policy.
No, that’s OK… Emmy, sir. It’s just…well…the MM 350 looks a lot like a Mr. Microphone.
I assure you this is a finely tuned instrument for a new kind of war. A war…let me see if I can recall the wording from the manual..”fraught with peril at every turn because of the arrogance and narrow-minded policies of the previous administration
Sir, I agree with Private Jacobs. That looks like a Mr. Microphone.